Required Survey: (ok fine.. there is no "requirement" I'm not gonna hunt you down or anything.. just answer the damm survey)
Ok .. all of you that are married or have boy or girlfriends... When your significant other falls asleep on the couch watching TV and you wake up in the middle of the night and realize they are not in bed, what is the proper response?
A. Roll over and go to sleep. They're fine. The doors are locked.
B. Go tap them on the shoulder lightly and say, "Honey, come to bed"
C. Take their beer out of their hand, put a blanket on them, and let them sleep.
D. When you see them on the couch you tiptoe back to bed because you can't hear the snoring from there and you might actually get a good night's sleep.
E. Scream, "WHAT THE H*LL!!!!??? What are you doing!!??!!! I thought I heard something in the attic. Go look and see what it is!!
Decide on your answer before reading my predictions. I am going to make these guesses:
A. Men that have been married more than 3 years answer A.
B. New couples and nice women that like having their man with them answer B.
C. This what I would do and for the life of me I cannot understand why it never happens
D. This is what the SMART women do.
E. "E" stands for "EX" ...as in THIS is what my ex-wife used to do. One of the MANY reasons I am no longer married.
So, There are Two Answers you must give. 1) What SHOULD you do and 2) What WOULD you do (be honest. no names will ever be "unmasked")... To the News...
Venice: FIRE FIRE FIRE !!!! An explosion at a chemical plant in the industrial zone of Malcontenta, near Venice, has triggered a major emergency response operation, with residents asked to shelter in place and block their windows with damp rags. Geez... forget shelter in place. Get UPWIND of that smoke and gas and DON'T BREATH IT IN !!! .. and..
Scientists in Japan did an experiment with a special "paint" that they put on ONE persons hands. They fed the man and a bunch of friends a gourmet buffet to demonstrate how easily a virus can spread at a restaurant or especially places like a cruise ship. After the meal they turned out the lights and turned on a black light. The virus paint was on EVERYONE.. HERE is the video. (:35) ..and..
Autoworkers in Detroit are heading back to work. With masks and sanitizer they are headed back to build those pick-up trucks they expect you to buy when the lockdown is over. Will there be pent up demand? .. We'll see ... and..
In Da Swamp: Strike that.... Reverse it ... Joe Biden needs a lesson from Ron Burgundy and just READ the Teleprompter and DON'T THINK!! .. In a virtual meeting with some Governors, Biden told America that, "we've lost 85,000 jobs and Millions and Millions of lives" in the Coronavirus pandemic. Uh.. yeah .. Elmer J. Fudd, Millionaire. I own a mansion and a yacht. I am Elmer J Fudd, millionaire. I own a mansion and a yacht..... and....
Senator Burr steps down as head of the Intelligence committee today because of the investigation into stock sales. The FBI is looking into Burr and his brother selling large amounts of stock in February after being briefed on the deadliness of Coronavirus ... and..
Hackers that broke into the computer system at a NY Law firm are demanding $21 million ransom. The law firm represents famous people like Bruce Springsteen, Lady Gaga, U2 and Mariah Carey. Today they doubled the request to $42 million and included President Trump in the list of people they will "release information on". Trump has never been a client of the firm. But, they could possibly have emails about him or other personal information if there were ever contracts with him and a firm client. ... Hmmmm... and...
Can someone tell me why we're now seeing "Sign Language" people standing next to a lot of Governors and other public speakers on TV? I am not against including the deaf in our world of misinformation and fake news.. but.. There is this thing called, "Closed Captioning". They have it on just about EVERY television made since 1995. !!
SPORTS: Lady and Gentlemen, START YOUR ENGINES !!! Nascar is BACK. Darlington, SC. No qualifying.. no fans .. But the race is ON !!!
NFL: DeAndre Baker is a cornerback for the NY Giants and Quinton Dunbar is a cornerback for the Seattle Seahawks. Soon they may be inmates: M99871 and M99872. Arrest warrants were issued for 4 counts of armed robbery and assault with a deadly weapon as the two were charged with robbing a house party after losing money gambling. Is THIS what they meant when they said the lockdown might cost more lives than the Coronavirus?
CELEBRIDIOTS: Darius Rucker is ESSENTIAL. The lead singer of Hootie and the Blowfish, country singer, South Carolina Gamecock, PGA Tour Ambassador and general good dude (I know that first hand) will be singing the National Anthem at the NASCAR race. Should be cool.. ..and..
A reporter stoked the rift between Crosby Stills Nash and Young by asking David Crosby if any of them would call to offer condolences over the death of his "son". It took me a few seconds to figure out what he was talking about. Crosby was the sperm donor for Melissa Etheridge and Julie Cypher's son Beckett, whom I told you yesterday died of an Opioid overdose. Now, I know the sperm donor is the biological father.. but.. Beckett was the son of Etheridge and Cypher (whom were married for 10 years and raised two children).
So.. let me ask you people.. Do you call to offer condolences to the sperm donor? What's the protocol? .. I guess it would be nice.. But, I'm not sure I would think to.. .. and F-U to the reporter for using a child's death to stoke fires and get attention. (Don't argue you didn't. You could have called Crosby quietly or messaged him directly) ...and...
How did I miss this, "Never have I ever" Netflix show? Mindy Kaling (From The Office) made this show about an Indian/American 10th grade girl living in California. Its the normal "girl tries to fit in ...and is boy crazy ...and her traditional parents try to ruin her life". But, it's narrated by.... JOHN MCENROE !!! Yes, THAT John McEnroe. It HAS to be hilarious., Right? Apparently, it's been out a month and Season 2 is on the way. I'm putting all of you in the penalty box for not telling me. I'm gonna watch it this weekend... and..
As you all know, I am ALL ABOUT civil liberty. Do what you want and whomever you want so long as everyone is an adult and consenting... But, I gotta say.. I don't find the "naked pregnant woman" look at ALL sexy. The first BIG one I can remember was Demi Moore years ago. I remember thinking, "Demi is usually hot. That picture is gross". When I see that stuff I don't think, "how wonderful" I think, "YUK" !!!! I'm mentioning this because a pic of actress/singer Lea Michele is all over the place. I'm not including a link because its gross. If that's your fetish just google her.. its all over.. Lea, youre hot.. you're a good singer.. but PUT ON A SWEATSHIRT !!! ...and..
If you told me last year to walk into a liquor store wearing a mask, I would have laughed... If you told a woman last year, "Yeah, that bikini looks hot. If you would just COVER YOUR MOUTH it would be PERFECT!" you would probably get slapped. Not now. The Tri-kini is here!!! Its a bikini ..with a matching Covid-19 Mask!!! HERE .. Safety First, Ladies !!!
As the U.S. tries to wrestle global supply chains back from China, Taiwan Semiconductor (NYSE:TSM), a major supplier to Apple (NASDAQ:AAPL) and Qualcomm (NASDAQ:QCOM), has confirmed plans to build a $12B chip factory in Arizona. The plant, which would create over 1,600 jobs, will produce the most sophisticated 5-nanometer chips that can be used in high-end defense and communications devices. The Trump administration is also in talks with Intel (NASDAQ:INTC) about new foundries. While the company has major manufacturing operations in the U.S., it supplies only its own chips rather than making them for outside customers.
"These stupid supply chains that are all over the world... and one little piece of the world goes bad, and the whole thing is messed up," President Trump told Fox Business Network's Maria Bartiromo. "We shouldn't have supply chains. We should have them all in the United States," he added, citing effects of the coronavirus pandemic. "My goal is to produce everything America needs for ourselves and then export to the world."
The White House is also preparing an executive order which will require certain essential drugs be made in the U.S., sources told CNBC’s Kayla Tausche, adding that an announcement could come as soon as today. The order would direct HHS to study the supply chain, analyze weaknesses and report back to the Trump administration in 90 days. About 72% of pharma ingredient manufacturers supplying the U.S. are located overseas, including 13% in China, according to an October congressional testimony by Janet Woodcock, director of the FDA's Center for Drug Evaluation and Research.
A choppy session ensued on Thursday following the release of weekly jobless claims that saw another 3M Americans filing for benefits, bringing the total number to more than 36M since the coronavirus crisis began. All three major U.S. stock indexes ended the session solidly higher, however, while futures climbed another 0.3% overnight. A White House spokeswoman said President Trump is open to another possible stimulus bill, but will not sign the bill put forward by House of Representatives Democrats. On the calendar for today is retail sales data for April, expected to have collapsed 12% last month, marking the second-biggest decline since the government started tracking the series in 1992.
Shares of Abbott Laboratories (NYSE:ABT) are off 3% premarket as the FDA investigates preliminary data that found inconsistencies with the company's rapid coronavirus test. The analysis of ID NOW, which is used at the White House, found that it missed at least a third of positive cases detected by a rival test and as much as 48% when using the currently recommended dry nasal swabs. Abbott rejected the findings, saying the researchers used the test "in ways that it was not designed to be used." Go deeper: Britain approves Abbott, Roche antibody test.
The New York Stock Exchange (NYSE:ICE) will open to a subset of floor brokers on May 26, who will be required to wear masks and follow strict social distancing requirements. They'll also be encouraged to avoid public transportation, and will be screened and have their temperatures taken when they enter the building. Why open if the exchange was functioning remotely? "Recent data demonstrate that our trading floor saves investors millions of dollars each day by making transactions more efficient," said NYSE President Stacey Cunningham.
Facebook's (NASDAQ:FB) internet project is moving forward with the help of some global partners, including China Mobile (NYSE:CHL), Orange (NYSE:ORAN) and Vodafone (NASDAQ:VOD). The 23,000-mile underwater internet cable circling the continent will link 16 countries with Europe and the Arabian peninsula and more than double its potential bandwidth. Construction is expected to be completed in 2023 or early 2024 and highlights increased interest from Silicon Valley companies in Africa.
While final negotiations with lenders could still spill into the weekend, J.C. Penney (NYSE:JCP) is planning to file for bankruptcy within the next 24 hours, CNBC reports. The retailer has been in discussions with its first-lien lenders for a $450M loan to finance the bankruptcy and would require the achievement of certain goals to receive the second half of it. Restructuring plans include closing 180-200 out of the 846 J.C. Penney department stores that were active as of February.
What else is happening...
Thursday's Key Earnings
In Asia, Japan +0.6%. Hong Kong -0.1%. China -0.1%. India -0.1%. In Europe, at midday, London +1.4%. Paris +0.9%. Frankfurt +1.7%. Futures at 6:20, Dow +0.3%. S&P +0.3%. Nasdaq +0.5%. Crude +3.6% to $28.55. Gold +0.2% to $1743.70. Bitcoin -0.9% to $9619. Ten-year Treasury Yield flat at 0.61%
Today's Economic Calendar
8:30 Retail Sales
10:00 Business Inventories
10:00 Consumer Sentiment
1:00 PM Baker-Hughes Rig Count
4:00 PM Treasury International Capital
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